Saturday, February 25, 2006

85 year old to climb Everest with Dachshund.


Mary Woodbridge is an 85 year old with a plan. To forge a new trail to the summit of Mt Everest. With her Dachshund, Daisy. Because she feels sorry for the sherpas, she'll be climbing alone with her canine pal. "I feel sorry for the boys. I can certainly carry my own food and the few cans of dog food for Daisy."
The stalwart English oldster has been training all winter, climbing hills near her home and quite sensibly stretching before exercising. Because her arduous training programme has prepared the pair to climb without oxygen tanks, she will have room in her backpack for lobster stew, power crunchies for Daisy and tea, as befits a proper Englishwoman. Mary's expedition equipment is pictured here.
Scoffing at naysayers, Mary asserts "I’m sure we can make it to the top of Mount Everest. We both go for a walk every day and keep ourselves very fit!"
Mary's ascent will begin on March 4. You can follow her progress on her website.
Go, Mary, go!
Aha! I wondered what the hook was. It was a very clever ad campaign for Mammut outdoor gear. Cute!

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Stupid things people say when you are walking a Rottweiler.

  • Do it bite?
  • Is he mean?
  • Is he friendly?
  • Shit, I'd like to see him fight my pit.
  • How much does he weigh?
  • Is that a German Rott or an American Rott?*
  • I had a neighbor with a 270lb Rockwilder, head came up to here.*

*There is no difference. Well, I suppose there is, if the dog was born in Germany (or Austria, or Scotland, or Turkey....) Actually Germany has banned tail docking. If I'm feeling snarky I say "no, he doesn't have his tail" and keep going. The sort of person who asks this question is by definition clueless and can't figure out a response.

*The sort of person who tells you about the fabled humungous Rottweiler invariably calls it a "Rockwilder." Again, clueless. Not to mention lying. This one is terribly common - ask any Rottweiler owner. Many labs and Goldens are about the same size as a proper-sized Rottweiler, but their owners don't get asked this question often.

The standard calls for a "medium large" dog and mid size is "preferred." Which means the dog rarely should weigh much over 120lbs. Much bigger than that and you have an obese, or structurally unsound, unathletic dog.

In my neighborhood (Flint's East side, not for the faint of heart) generally people cross the street when they see me coming. Especially when I am walking both of them. It's pretty funny, not to mention I feel quite safe.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Oh, just give them a T-bone.

The hard little twig-like things on the left are Bacon Flavored Jerky Treats for Dogs. They cost $16.36/lb. The juicy plump things on the right are Koegels chicken hot dogs and cost $1.99/lb.
Let's look at what we're getting for our money, shall we?
Bacon sticks dog treats – Jerky Treats For Dogs!
Meat by-products, soy grits, sugar, dextrose, glycerine, salt, hydrolyzed soy and corn protein, natural and artificial bacon flavor, natural smoke flavor, potassium sorbate, oil of garlic, natural flavorings, sodium nitrite.
$16.36/lb
Chicken Hot Dogs.
Chicken, water, salt, sugar, paprika, sodium erythorbate, spice extractives, garlic powder, sodium nitrite. Stuffed in natural sheep casing.
$1.99/lb
(Not pictured) Beef jerky.
Beef.
$6.00/lb

When you think about it, just buying pure jerky is insanely cheaper and more sensible than buying “bacon” jerky treats which a: are not actually jerky, and b: have “natural and artificial” bacon flavor as the 8th ingredient.
Or for a fraction of the price, hot dogs are more healthful with way less junk in them than most dog treats. And, my dogs think hot dogs are doggie crack & aren't as enthusiastic about most dog treats, not that they get them often.
Or you can buy those preservative soaked meat flavored twig things for $16.36/lb.
Now, don't you feel stupid (and manipulated by clever marketing) for ever buying "dog treats"? I do.